There are certain topics in the workplace that are supposed to be off limits. In polite society, these topics are also excluded from the dinner table! I recently had a somewhat awkward “too much information” situation at work. I’ve had a large mole near my left eyebrow for most of my life, but it’s been growing in the last few years. After several reminders from my mom, I finally made the appointment to have it removed. It turns out that it was large enough and deep enough that they had to perform a small surgery to excise the mole, resulting in 4 stitches sitting smack in the middle of my face! I had to wear a band-aid when I returned to work the day after the removal, and I had black stitches showing for the next week.
The first awkward moment happened when I had to go to my first doctor’s appointment. I was under the impression that I could have the mole removed in one visit, so I scheduled a sick day for the entire day off on a Friday. I walked past a manager’s office on my way out on Thursday, and he said, “I’ll see you tomorrow!” I replied that I would be out on Friday, and he asked where I was going. I replied that I had a doctor’s appointment, and he had a confused look and asked, “Oh, the whole day?” I then explained about the mole and he told me, “good luck.” It’s always said that women give too much information in the workplace, but humans are naturally curious about things, especially when they require a full day of scheduled sick time. And, in this case, it wasn’t an overly gross or invasive procedure, so I didn’t mind going into details. But, what if it had been something intensely personal, like IVF? Or, something particularly gross, like a colonoscopy? Or, more awkward, what if I was lying and I had job interviews set up at other companies? At what point do we deflect questions that might force us to provide TMI? Personally, the interaction with my manager didn’t bother me, because I know he wasn’t trying to “catch” me doing something wrong, but the situation still illustrates how easy it can be to meander into awkward or illegal territory.
In addition to the awkward explanation about the doctor’s visit, it was also awkward when I returned to the office. Since it was clear that something had happened to me, some of my colleagues just asked, “What happened to your eye?” In that situation, I just told them that I had a mole removed, and that was that. Some of my colleagues did their best not to stare, but I finally just spoke up and told them that I’d had a mole removed, and again, no big deal. I think sometimes we draw more attention to an issue if we ignore it, because people are stuck speculating about what happened, why it happened, and what’s been done to fix it. I think it’s better to be up front, with a succinct answer when something is obviously visible to the naked eye. However, I think you should keep less obvious issues to yourself. I mentioned IVF and a colonoscopy above, and if asked about my doctor’s visit, I would probably just say, “Oh, you know, routine check-up stuff. Always good to drop by the doctor’s office once or twice a year!” Most people won’t press you further, and I think it’s better to just leave it vague.
I’ve never had a chronic condition that required frequent doctor’s visits, but this situation can lead to more awkward conversations than a one-time, obviously temporary ailment. I had a colleague that was diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease, which affects the digestive system. This colleague did well to excuse his absence and doctor’s visits by saying, “I’ve been having some issues with my digestive system, and I found out that I have Crohn’s.” This allowed us to go look up Crohn’s symptoms, without having to hear the details of his illness directly from him. Contrast this politically correct response to another colleague I had that went through some health issues. She mentioned a mammogram, a colonoscopy, and a visit to the OBGYN, loud enough for several colleagues to hear it. While each of these procedures was medically necessary, I personally wouldn’t want my colleagues (especially the male colleagues!) to know when I went to the doctor for “lady stuff”. Quite frankly, I don’t think the men want to know any more about the “lady stuff” than they already do, so specific comments about the nature of a doctor’s visit are even more awkward!
I think there’s a fine line between explaining frequent or extended absence, and making sure that you aren’t providing TMI in the workplace. In the case of my mole removal, the “gory details” were tame, succinct, and temporary, so I didn’t mind revealing more about my injury. But, for internal issues that are much messier or gender-specific, I think those are best left out of the workplace.
I’ve attended a few client dinners and company-sponsored lunches, and I’ve noticed some interesting trends about myself and my colleagues when it comes to eating in the workplace. Maybe it’s because I’m early in my career, but it seems to transcend into the senior ranks as well. So, without further adieu, a few observations:
No one wants to be the first to take the bread or chips on the table. I love bread, and I grew up in a family that obliterates bread. Those loaves at Italian restaurants? Yeah, we’re going to need 3 of those to keep us happy until you bring out our drinks. At Mexican restaurants, the waiter quickly discovers that we each need an individual basket of chips, because otherwise, they’ll spend their whole evening replacing our basket. We just LOVE bread and chips! But, when I sit down with my work colleagues, I suddenly feel restricted to one piece of bread. And, I don’t want to be the first to reach for it. This is silly, because everyone is staring at the bread, wishing they could take a piece, and then someone awkwardly offers me the first piece because I’m usually the only woman at the table! Then, no one wants to eat more bread than anyone else, so we all end up with a half-eaten roll on our plates, wishing we could take seconds from the bread basket. So, if we’re all thinking it, why is it so hard to just take the first piece, go back for seconds if you want it, and finish what’s on your plate?
No one wants to take the last piece. The accounting department ordered pizza the other day, and since I sit on the same floor as the accounting department, they invited me to join them. We had the awkward “take the first slice” moment (similar to the bread moment mentioned above!), and we ended up with three extra slices of pizza. Those slices have been sitting in the fridge for 3 days, because no one wants to be “greedy” and take the last piece. Again, this is silly, as we all probably could have eaten one more slice, thus enjoying the meal more, and reducing waste. But, we have to be polite, and apparently it’s more polite to waste food than to be greedy. This is even more ridiculous when you consider that I thought about eating the leftover slices, but since the food was technically meant for the accounting department, and I’m not in accounting, I felt that I shouldn’t take “their” food!
No one wants to be a glutton. It may not look like it, but I can eat A LOT of food. Like, inhale-a-large-pizza-and-dessert amount of food. When I’m with my husband or my parents and siblings, I go back for seconds, and sometimes, thirds of each item. I eat pie and ice cream, baskets of chips, and an entire platter of fajitas and fixings! But, once again, put me with my co-workers, and I start trying to match their food intake. It seems like everyone else does this, because everyone rarely finishes their dinner. Again, this is silly, because we know we’d love to finish the fabulous meal, but we don’t want people to think we’re gluttonous, so instead, we let them think we’re wasteful.
Everyone uses overly-exaggerated manners. It’s always really awkward to go to a pizza place or barbeque place with my co-workers, because everyone tries to use their fancy manners when it’s just not that conducive. Consider paper napkins: they just don’t go in your lap the same way that cloth napkins do! This is especially true when you consider that a lot of places that have paper napkins also serve the type of food that’s best eaten with your hands. Does it really make sense to try to eat a slice of pizza with a fork and knife, holding your paper napkin in your lap? NO. If you don’t want to see this type of normal dining behavior, you should pick a different restaurant! I’m not talking about courtesy, like chewing with your mouth closed, but rather logistics. We love some good barbeque in our southern aviation dinners, so that probably means we should eat the barbeque “properly”… ie: usually best with your fingers. If you’re offended by finger-food, go somewhere that doesn’t serve it!
It’s just hilarious, because we’re all trying to be on our best behavior with our colleagues, and yet we’re all just regular people that like to eat copious amounts of bread with our fingers. This is also incongruent with the ever-present “keep up with the Jones” mentality that glorifies having more, more, more! We want bigger houses, fancier cars, and fashionable clothes, but we can’t eat that last piece of bread? We can’t clean our plates, lest we look greedy? We push to negotiate for a higher starting salary, but we can’t bring ourselves to take that last slice of pizza! So, I ask, are you “real” when you eat with your colleagues?
I’ve got a busy weekend planned, complete with homework, chores, and a CHL class! That’s right, I’ll be heading to class with a Glock to learn how to handle it properly… become one with the gun, that will be my motto this weekend. Here’s what I’m reading:
For those looking to travel cheap: Workaway
For those dealing with workplace conflict, via The Daily Muse: 3 Times It’s Better to Take the High Road
For those going through a career transition, via Corporette: How to Campaign for the Job You Already Have
For those in the freelance game, via The New Professional: The Halfway Point (an Honest Look)
Like the links? Follow me on Twitter for links and blog posts every day!
Dear Tradeshow Organizer,
Why didn’t you sign up for the online ordering option for carpet, furniture, electrics, and every other standard service at a tradeshow? Why do you insist on making me fill out 10 different forms, fax or scan+email them back to you, and email you to request a confirmation of receipt and an actual receipt for my payment? Further, why don’t you take my AMEX credit card in Europe? Is it really that much more expensive? Surely it’s more expensive to process a wire transfer or company check than it is to pay whatever fees AMEX will charge you to operate in Europe!
Signed,
A Frustrated Marketer
Alright, readers, that’s my annoying rant for the morning, but there is some truth to what I’m saying. This is a worldwide show, with hundreds of exhibitors and thousands of attendees, and the provider of the tradeshow services has provided online ordering for several shows that I’ve been involved in. In addition to making it less of a hassle for me to do the ordering, it seems like it should be less of a hassle for show organizers. With online ordering, my information is pre-populated, so there’s less room for human error in entering company name, booth number, and contact information. Particularly for my last name, people have trouble distinguishing my “n” from my “u”. Thus, when they try to email a confirmation to ashleyfans@companyname.com, I don’t receive it. So, now they’re spending more man hours going back and forth with me on the confirmation, and occasionally, denying my credit card because they have attributed it to “Ashley Fans”. I assume someone has to do the data entry into a system somewhere in their system, so why not let it be the customer, one time, instead of forcing the customer to hand-write 10 forms, and then forcing your employee to input it into the system! Then, your employee accidentally inputs the wrong spelling of my name because they couldn’t read the hand-written form, and now you have to waste more labor hours having them fix it. And, what if two different people receive my forms, so now there’s two of me in the system? It just doesn’t make sense to opt out of the online ordering, since I know the system is already in place!
Then there’s the credit card issue. I have a corporate AMEX that I use for the tradeshows, as the bills can be pretty expensive (hence the reason I’m not expected to put it on a personal credit card and expense it). Apparently, the European companies don’t take my AMEX…. but some of them do! I know there are fees associated with credit card processing, but AMEX is one of the most popular cards in the world. It’s surprising that many European countries don’t accept this, particularly tradeshow organizers that do business with the entire world.
So, now you can’t read my writing, AND you can’t accept my payment. Sigh… I’m off to ask for a wire transfer and a penmanship class. Here’s to tradeshow organizers that are making things more difficult than they have to be!
Trying on clothes shouldn't take an hour!
At least it doesn't take that long to try on shoes.
Skirt: JC Penney
Tank and Cardigan: Target
Shoes: Old Navy
Necklace and Earrings: NY & Co.
Like the outfit? See more details here!
I’m going to look at a marketing and operations conundrum in today’s post, inspired by several experiences at retailer H&M. I received a gift card to the store for Christmas, but I’ve yet to make a purchase. Every time I go in there, the line for the dressing room is ridiculous! We have two locations in the Dallas area, and both of them have terrible issues with the dressing room situation. My sister dropped by an H&M recently, and she also mentioned that she had to wait in line forever to try something on. You might be thinking that this means that H&M is popular and thriving, but in reality, it’s hurting their business.
First, the obvious issue: long lines are making people completely abandon their purchase. I’ve seen women trudging toward the line carrying an armload of clothes, only to look up and down the line in dismay, and dump that armload of clothes onto a nearby table and walk out of the store! Again, some might think it’s ok, because you’ve got all these people willing to wait in line, so they’ll make up for the abandoned purchase. Except, the reason the dressing room line is so long stems from another issue that also affects purchasing.
H&M fit and quality are hit or miss at best, meaning that you have to grab 3 of every item if you want to have any shot at finding something that fits. Sure, in theory, people are carrying in loads of stuff that they’d like to purchase. The problem is that they have no intention of purchasing every item, because at least 2 of the 3 sizes they’ve brought in won’t actually fit! Now you’ve made the lines ridiculously long with no greater shot at increasing the average purchase, and you’ve made other potential buyers abandon their purchase altogether! On top of all that, they’re forced to hire extra floor personnel to handle all the re-stocking because customers are grabbing more items than they normally would if the fit were somewhat consistent.
So if trying on the outfits is such a pain due to the long line and unreliable fit, why don’t customers just buy all the items they like in several sizes, try them on in the comfort of their own home, and return the unwanted items? Because the buy/return lines are ALSO ridiculously long! Maybe people are starting to try that, but instead of reducing the time spent waiting to try on items, they’ve actually just doubled the waiting time in both places. I’ve found one or two items that fit, but I wasn’t willing to wait AGAIN to actually make the purchase, and I’m definitely not willing to make a purchase first, hope it fits, and then have to come back to wait in line.
H&M isn’t trying to sell an amazing shopping experience or the highest quality clothing, but their unreliable fit is leading to long lines in the dressing room and check-out counter, which is causing a high rate of purchase abandonment. There’s a few ways to fix this: make the fit more reliable, build more dressing rooms, or hire more employees to deal with the chaos that their operational problems have caused. This is a pretty classic case study with obvious flaws in operational and marketing execution, and I’m hoping the drop in sales will make them change their strategy in the near future… I want to spend my giftcard, after all! Like the outfit? See more details here!
I’ve got another article on the Daily Muse today, discussing 3 situations when it’s best to take the high road. I’ve written several articles for the Daily Muse, and you can read them here.
The Daily Muse is a great site that offers advice to professional women, and I highly recommend browsing through the articles from the other talented writers!
We had massive hail storms and several tornado touchdowns in Dallas yesterday, and it got me thinking about how different the reporting types of events has changed so drastically. It used to be the you had someone on a horse riding out to the storm to see how big it was, then trying to outrun the storm back to town to warn everyone that the storm was coming. Fast forward quite a bit, and we’ve got the technology to report on a storm in real time, but we still had to send someone out there with a camera and a mic. In times past, you only got a piece of the story: generally, the most juicy piece, which was the size of the storm. A few weeks or a few days later, and you’d get the other juicy piece of the story, the damage.
Yesterday’s “reporters” were real people with smart phones, recording, tweeting, and posting pictures and videos of the storm in real time. It was teachers taking a photo of their third grade class in duck-and-cover position in the hallway. It was high school students tweeting photos of blown out windshields immediately after the storm passed through. It was parents posting Facebook status updates about school closures. It was my husband contacting me on instant message, cell phone, and office phone to make sure I wasn’t in a place where people were live-streaming an approaching twister. These are real people, with real stories, from every angle.
I’m gearing up for an insane week at work and school, so the posting will be a little spotty (kinda like last week, sorry about that!). However, I had to take a moment to write a quick post on an interesting pricing scheme that I saw at the carwash the other day.
There was a sign advertising “Unlimited Monthly Car Washes: Convenient! Save Money! Keep Your Car Clean!!!!!!! Starting at just $30 per month!!!!!!!!” When I came to the price, I was immediately trying to work out how many washes I’d have to get for the pass to be more worth it than the $4 Express Wash that they offer all the time. I’d have to get 8 washes! Now, maybe these washes with the pass are more extensive than the $4 Express Wash, but it seems like this pricing is off, at least if the consumer is smart. Who gets their car washed twice per week? Obviously, the goal with any “unlimited” pricing is to make the price high enough that the person doesn’t get the full use out of it, so the company makes money because customers have effectively paid for a car wash every day, but only end up getting their car washed once a week (or less, if you’re me). They’re hoping customers will see $30, and equate it with a $1 car wash. While this calculation was my first instinct (who doesn’t like simple math, right?), I immediately noticed that something was off about it. Now, I’m not the first person to want to crunch the numbers, but simple division? Even I can figure out that I’m getting jipped if I buy the monthly pass!
So to all the marketers that think their fancy pricing scheme will work, you gotta make it a little less obvious that you’re trying to make sure I don’t get the full value of my purchase! Make sure you look at the cost per use AND the frequency of use before buying “deals” like monthly passes.
I talked about how technology levels the playing field in my previous post, and it got me thinking about the limiting factor in today’s society. I cycled through attributes like intelligence and time as the limiting factor, but finally landed on the word “raw”. With all that technology can do, and the nature of specialization in our society, a lot of people can fake a lot of things, including intelligence and skill. A few lucky shots or a well-placed industry buzz word might convince a whole crowd that you’re the expert.
I think raw is an abstract concept that I haven’t totally defined, but I know it has something to do with someone’s inherent ability to do a task. The task is also pretty abstract, since it could be “create and communicate a vision”, or “change the world”. Or, it could be as simple as “make a great card”. I’ve mentioned that my mom and I do a lot of scrapbooking and card-making, and we both get a lot of compliments on our creativity. But then we look through some blogs or catalogs, learn a new technique, or purchase a new tool, and we feel like we’re not creative at all, we’re just copycats! We wonder what kind of raw creativity someone must possess to come up with such a technique, because there’s no way we could’ve figured it out. My mom and I create beautiful work, but do we really have the “raw” factor? Is what we bring to the table so incredibly unique that no amount of technology or teaching could make someone our equal? I’ll be the first to say say, “DEFINITELY NOT!”
But what about people that use the raw factor to change the world via technology? Was it the human mind that conceived the idea, the human skill that built the tool, or the technology itself? Think about Facebook, a technology that has fundamentally shifted the way humans interact with each other. Sure, Mark Zuckerburg had a great idea, but did he really envision the re-work of social science as a result of his tool? Is he a visionary that will continue to change the world, or a guy who happened on the right idea, at the right time, via the right technology? What about the old-school inventors and thinkers, from Aristotle to Edison, with game-changing ideas and technology? Surely, there’s something innate in their abilities that allowed them to come up with their philosophies and inventions!
You can’t learn the raw factor, and you can’t mimic the raw factor… it just exists for some people. We don’t know what “it” is, that quality that takes someone from “smart” to “visionary”, from “creative” to “creator”, from “talented” to “unequaled”. It takes 10,000 hours to become an expert, but even experts can’t compete with raw talent, brain power, creativity, or vision. I think in a world where technology has leveled the playing field, “raw” is the new limiting factor, and I don’t know that we’ll ever be able to replace or replicate that.
My hobbyist husband owns a high-quality lens and studio lights. My amateur modeling, hair, and make-up knowledge and materials come from reality TV and Wal-Mart!
We live in the “Information Age”, where it’s possible to get any information, on any subject, anywhere in the world, in less than one minute. Some of my classmates posited that “Information Age” doesn’t equal “Knowledge Age”. And, while I agree with this to some extent, I have to say, technology has leveled the playing field. Case in point: the picture at the top of the post.
Technology has made everything better, faster, and cheaper, including learning. My husband purchased his professional-grade camera and lenses for a few thousand dollars, and a light kit for less than $1k. For a total of about $3,000, total amateurs can set up a studio almost anywhere. Then there’s my contribution, complete with modeling techniques gleaned from a few episodes of “America’s Next Top Model” (you know you see the difference when you schmize, don’t lie!), make-up techniques from around the web, and super convenient hot rollers (vs. the heated metal rods of yesteryear, I can just smell the hair burning!). We then used an open-source software called GIMP to edit the photos, and we’re now sharing them with the world via the free gallery, SmugMug. You don’t have to be a “professional” to get magazine-quality photos anymore.
And it’s not just pictures or “frivolous” endeavors. Take TurboTax and QuickBooks, software programs that allow most anyone to process a simple tax return. Or email and Skype, functions that allow companies to go global from a single conference room. My husband has fixed our dishwasher and rebuilt a toilet after watching a few instructional YouTube videos. Programs like Band in a Box allow you to create music for multiple instruments, and composition software makes it easy to transpose and update the melodies in your head. Airplanes have made travel cheap, easy, and fast… I can literally fly around the world in a day. That’s INCREDIBLE.
So, with all that technology enables common laypeople to do, what’s the point of a fancy degree or hiring a professional? First, there are certainly areas that require specialized training, like medicine. Would you want a surgeon that learned how to clip a brain aneurysm via YouTube? Other professions that deal with government regulations definitely require some standard, so I think it’s reasonable to require a law degree, accounting degree, or pilot’s license. I do think that many professions outside of creative endeavors still need some objective standard, and the licensing and educational requirements ensure safety and accuracy. But the creative professions? I think it’s becoming a free for all, and technology has definitely leveled the playing field. You don’t have to have access to expensive printing presses and hazardous chemicals to achieve quality pictures. You don’t have to have a private recording studio, a fancy sound man, or a huge label to make and share music. This is not to say that you don’t have to have skills and talent, but the “who you know” or prohibitive equipment costs create less of a barrier to entry. The thing is, though, that with so much free information available, it’s also easier to gain the knowledge and skills! You don’t have to take an apprenticeship or spend years learning a specialized piece of equipment anymore, and you can experiment with things cheaply to learn.
I’ve been blown away recently by how much technology has leveled the playing field, both in the professional and personal spheres. I think that as technology enables learning and use, the market is going to start favoring those with the ellusive-to-quantify “people skills”, “management skills”, “spark/charisma/creativity”, and generally qualities/talents that are much more difficult to learn. If anyone can differentiate themselves via technology, what’s the limiting factor in today’s society?